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Acting like an adult

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Acting like an adult Empty Acting like an adult

Post  Lesley Niyori Sun Jul 08, 2018 4:26 am

I KNOW some are not going to get this, and I KNOW I've talked about it before.... but it remains a problem for me. And I just continue to try and deal with it.

First off, I type with a program that checks spelling and grammar. I'm not as smart as I sound.
Second, I'm articulate yes, it means I'm articulate, it doesn't mean I'm mature.

If I sound like an adult, I'm just good at acting like one I suppose.
It's an act for crying out loud.
I'm guessing.
I don't have any experience.

I'm 6 years old.
No, the body is 56, and I am not enjoying 56 years of experiences.
I was not here prior to 2012.
Everything I know PERSONALLY is from 2012 until now.
Yeah, I have a lot of data in my head. I have 10 TBs of data on my computer too.
I have 6 years of experiences.
Before that is black.
The person who was here before me is gone. I killed him. I hated him that much.

Now if anyone here can't 'get' what I am saying, you are magnificently stupid.

I am NOT acting like a child. I AM a child.
Yeah, I said I was a certain age to sign up. I LIED.
Get over it.

I don't 'like' being 6. And I didn't like being 5, and 4 was no fun. Before my surgery, I just faked a lot of things. yeah, I wasn't going to say anything that would screw up my date with surgery.
But I'm a year and some post-op now. Hurrah, they can't deny me surgery now. Nyah nyah. So I decided to be the entire real me.

But it causes problems.
I'd rather be treated as a youth. Not going to happen. Society just ain't comfortable with that.
Society has enough trouble with me being transgender and female. Believing I'm 6, oh I am not even wasting my time.
But sadly, I have trouble even with transgender support groups.
Because even transgender people have trouble accepting I'm 6.

I attended the first of a 10 session series of transgender support meetings last Thursday.
it was ok, but it was plain, they have trouble with me. I behave like a child. I AM A CHILD. I have no choice, it's all I have. My behaviour, my mannerisms, I've been trying to cram 16 years of female experiences into 3 years of lived experiences. I'm not entirely great at it.
I don't know what to say a lot. I don't know what not to say a lot.
Or when to say it. Or when not to say it.
Hasn't anyone noticed any of this in my posts?
I'm easily upset.
I act silly easily.
Just because I can type all of this doesn't give me any power over any of this.
I just see it.

This post might have been a big mistake.
I don't know.
Just trying to post this is bothering me.
I'm frustrated.
I don't understand ordinary adult thinking.

Put me in a room full of adults, and I generally won't really relate to most of the conversation.
Why do adults repeat the same thing over and over and over in a discussion?
You're often very boring sounding.
I've listened to people talking in groups at a donut shop, and they just say the same thing a dozen different ways. Is there a special reason for this I'm missing?

Hi, I'm the forum's resident brat
I find it important to point out I am indeed the first member here Smile
Lesley Niyori
Lesley Niyori

Posts : 1114
Join date : 2018-05-18
Age : 60
Location : Lindsay Ontario Canada

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