What's in a name?

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Post  Lesley Niyori on Thu May 09, 2019 1:06 pm

Proud to mention, my D'arcy is now on her way to legally being D'arcy. Filed the documents yesterday. We've been slow to attack it, either not wanting to walk to her doctor's for the gender marker letter, or the damned doctor wasn't in. Or in a couple of cases, the government official told us we needed an addition to the wording (which reset our efforts back to scratch hehe).

But now, it's just waiting for it to arrive in the mail.

She has no love for her dead name. Is glad it's finally a done thing.
Now, her birth certificate gets replaced (lost it) and comes back corrected, and then we redo her ID with the proper details (driver's and OHIP cards and of course new pictures). Then we get to inform anyone and everyone that has any connection to her "oh my legal name is now..."

Her ex isn't too impressed. She never changed her own last when married, and now she will be divorced soon, and no evidence of D'arcy ever being in her life, and the two kids have a last name that isn't hers, or D'arcy's. So she's effectively cut out of the picture in a sort of way.

They don't seem to hate each other, but, she does tend to do things that might not earn her much friendliness. True, D'arcy has some moments in her past life that will likely be hard to walk away from too.

Next step, copy of marriage certificate, and then here's some money for lawyer to say "that's over".

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Post  Tara on Thu May 09, 2019 2:10 pm

cheers

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Post  MichaelaSJ on Thu May 09, 2019 5:15 pm

Good for her, Leslie!!!

I personally decided not to run from my boy name, Michael. I never thought I would consider anything other than the feminine gender for my name and I chose Michaela or Miki, for short.

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If you don't want a man unhappy politically, don't give him two sides to a question to worry him; give him one. Better yet, give him none. Let him forget there is such a thing as war. If the Government is inefficient, top-heavy, and tax-mad, better it is all those than that people worry over it. Peace, Montag.
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Post  Lesley Niyori on Thu May 09, 2019 6:21 pm

Just pointing out Miki, Leslie is my dead name.

Please use Lesley. Yes, there's a difference Smile

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Post  Celia Eriksson on Fri May 10, 2019 12:47 am

Hi Lesley,

I am very pleased that D'Arcy is getting all that sorted, great days in twain and I wish you both the very best!

I am sure Miki made a genuine mistake there....

I won't go far into it, but my birth name is quite obscure, though I know it is still used very rarely. The female version still starts with the letters Rag.... which is not really nice in English, once shortened as English people do. They always shorten names or give their own version of it, whether you like it or not! Tell them, hey I don't want to be called See, or Sees or Selly….. no they'll still do it. My birth name got quite a pounding.... Rags, Raggy Ragwort....

Celia xx

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Post  mariehart1 on Sun May 12, 2019 9:25 pm

Obviously as a Scandi name it was always going to be a target, Celia.

My birth name and the one I live under is actually male or female with spelling changes and slight change in pronunciation. No it's not Frances. I never liked it though hence Marie. Which is me.

I gave my boys hard names which can't be messed with except by adding an ie or y which make them affectionate.


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Post  MichaelaSJ on Sun May 12, 2019 11:23 pm

Apologies offered, Lesley.

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If you don't want a man unhappy politically, don't give him two sides to a question to worry him; give him one. Better yet, give him none. Let him forget there is such a thing as war. If the Government is inefficient, top-heavy, and tax-mad, better it is all those than that people worry over it. Peace, Montag.
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Post  Lesley Niyori on Mon May 13, 2019 2:10 am

MichaelaSJ wrote:Apologies offered, Lesley.

Likely not required dear, I imagine a lot don't realize my dead name is actually just a different spelling form.

I had pondered going with entirely new but decided it would be easier on everyone if spoken the name seemed unchanged. It only matters in print on documents. It's how I distinguish who I'm referring to (when not using he him pronouns).

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